About Sustainable Fashion and being a Conscious Consumer

I feel like the world is changing faster than I can say ‘I’, with the push to a plastic free society and the move towards sustainable living, I’m sometimes wondering what happened to the days of smoking packs of cigarettes in order to look cool.

But while the global shift in a more positive direction is one to be proud of (millennials I’m looking at you) it’s also one to be careful of when it comes to advertising and jumping on trends.

I’ve noticed this shortly after the passing of the Feminist t-shirt trend (which you’ll see down below), where it was cool to be proud of being a feminist, and brands didn’t hesitate to sell you pretty fashionable pieces to muster up your intersectional feminist self as you believed you were spending your money in the way of good deeds. Too far? Haha maybe, but listening to the views of this trend of whether companies were actually supporting women in this new market was interesting.

Questions came up, like whether the designer was a woman or maybe the photographer for those campaigns, or did any of the proceeds of those sales go to aiding underprivileged and disadvantaged women in some form. And these are all good questions we should be asking, but the answers I’m afraid remain a mystery as the lack of transparency by brands is not something we’ve actively pushed for as a society. Well, not yet.

The advent of sustainable fashion brands and local designers are up & coming and will very soon be all we want to be purchasing as consumers, but let’s not purchase just yet.

Let’s think about this. As the drive towards a sustainable lifestyle becomes more fashionable, you’ll soon see more and more fashion pieces with some amazingly sourced material at a bit of an expense compared to your poly blends, which by the way I try to stay clear of, because polyester is good for no-one.

But the fact is we will and are already paying a pretty penny for sustainable fashion pieces, and as the trend gets more attention, we’ll be paying even more.

So the choice will come down to, to use an analogy, do you want that McDonald’s meal or that 1 organic vegetable because they are basically the same price. My point is this, for that one piece of clothing that is produced from ethically sourced fabrics, made in an environment where the workers are paid and treated fairly, you could probably buy the whole of Zara. Okay, that’s an over exaggeration but it probably will feel like it one day.

So before you consider sustainable fashion as your be all and end all of your shopping experience and be ahead of the trend, let’s be conscious consumers first. 

Conscious consuming is a thought process.

We often define it in terms of ‘what’ we are buying, by checking the labels, finding out which fabrics are good enough, in which country the item of clothing was manufactured, all those good things. It’s synonymous with ethical fashion and maintaining a sustainable lifestyle.

It’s about being aware of your habits and knowing what’s good for you. And yes this is a good trend that has developed over recent years but because we are in such a consumer driven world, be careful not to just consume sustainable fashion just for the sake of.

We should also be asking ourselves why we’re consuming.

The idea of sustainable living is that we consume less, not that we consume tons of ethically produced items, it’s that we consume just enough to meet our needs and have those few items be of good value to ourselves and to the environment. 

How Can one Become a Conscious Consumer?

Well first, just stop buying shit.

That is already an act of service to the environment and maybe even to your own mental health. We consume far more than we need to and all the clutter has a negative effect on all of us.

Get rid of some stuff too, or a lot! Send all of your unused clothes to a charity and hey you might even feel good about it. Yay for mental health!

Strip down your closet to the things you KNOW you’ll wear and styling your outfits become easier in the mornings. Yay for productivity!

This is a perfect way to shop your closet and bring back older more nostalgic pieces, even if they’re no longer on trend, if you still like it then wear it.

This is also the time to be a proud outfit repeater. If you’re pieces are lasting for years and years then you know you’ve already been making good choices when it comes to sustainable fashion (except for polyester, that shit lasts forever and will never die).

Shop your friend’s closet, or your sis/bro’s closet and do a swap. I find that as we’ve got older it’s much easier to pass things along.

This leather coat I’m wearing I got from a friend when doing a swap (jackets for jeans – yaayyy). Yes, you can fight with me about how leather is not ethically produced, but this is how we consume less of it, by passing it a long, by giving it a new home.

And lastly, do an internet search of local designers in your area, chances are that they are producing sustainable fashion pieces that is also ethically manufactured and who are making positive changes to the industry.

This handbag I’m wearing is from Mors Design who are literally crafting bags out of recycled tyre tube.

There are so many interesting and innovative designers out there that you can support when you do feel it’s time to make a new purchase, because we all know, you really want to. That’s why you’re reading a fashion blog right? Jokes!

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Outfit Details: Jeans – Country Road, T-shirt – H&M, Handbag – Mors Design

Photography by Achmat Booley

About Living on Less – A 2 Week Challenge

Okay so here’s the deal – I’ve challenged myself out of spending money for the next 2 weeks for a multitude of reasons. But before I get into them let me just preface by saying this: I am spending money on food i.e. groceries and any other health benefits like, I don’t know, if I have to go to the doctor’s office for some reason or I catch a cold and I need something at the pharmacy, as well as any form of exercise that may cost a small amount because the point of this is not to die. I kid I kid.

I guess I got the idea once I realised I had too many things I needed to buy and just feeling like I didn’t have enough money to buy them. I feel like a lot of my days this year has been oh I need to get this thing and Oh I have to pay for that or literary just fuuuuccckkk I don’t have money for this! I’ve been watching numbers on a screen leave my bank account faster than I stop to think if that was necessary. So what are necessary purchases? Well, I guess this would depend on what is important for you as an individual and they’ll vary between us, if you think of trying the same challenge. Think of what is important for you and your own wellbeing and make that your priority purchases. Not everyone is going to count a gym membership as a priority or a travel plan for that matter but what is important to you is what you put your money towards. But that is the easy part. The hard part is facing the superfluous amounts of money you spend on things you don’t need and on instances you never remember. I think I go to a coffee shop about twice a day on auto-pilot but hardly remember what that was like or if I enjoyed the experience of being there.

And I’m not cutting out what is by far my favourite beverage but just having it at home or maybe if a friend really wants to grab one and I want to spend time socialising then that would be okay. The social aspect of this challenge should be interesting but I’m sure I’ll be able to navigate it just fine after some time. But I don’t think it’s going to be too hard or tragic, like curl up in a foetal position in a dark room because I can’t go out on a Friday night. No. You’re friends are awesome and they will understand and make a plan that works for everybody. Maybe I’ll miss out on waffles or lunch dates now & then but that’s okay because I want far more than that in the long run. And sometimes, the small changes are the big changes. 

So let’s talk about the ‘why’ factor for this challenge, which if you’re thinking oh just another someone jumping on the minimal trend, nothing new here, objects don’t bring you joy so get rid of them, start wearing black and white only and brush your teeth with bi-carb, etcetera etcetera, well not quite. I’ve stared this challenge for my own mental health to study the effects that a pay check has on my overall mood and wellbeing. And sure we all feel better when we get paid but what does this mean to my own self worth. Do I feel sure of myself when there’s some good looking cash sitting pretty in my bank account or do I feel this way regardless of how much I’m earning. How much money does it take to make me feel good about myself? And I hope the answer is zero and that my self worth comes from something far more profound than this, but we are living in an age which feels like consumerism on steroids. Every picture we view on Instagram feels like an advert for something and everybody too is selling you something (trust me, I’m a blogger), whether it’s a product, a diet, some famous person’s body or a lifetstyle. Everything is basically for sale. And the more media we consume the more we buy into this idea that we ‘need’ these things. 

But what do we really need as human beings? And can we be happy with ourselves without the excess cash, excess products and the extra lifestyle we’ve been conditioned to strive for. If you’re interested in joining me in this challenge or if you’ve already been challenging yourself to live on less for whatever reason then please share your experience in the comments below! I’d love to hear your thoughts.

Outfit Details: Jeans – Stradivarius, Handbag – Mors Design, Sneakers – Adidas, T-shirt – I honestly can’t remember, Lipstick – Stila Liquid Lipstick in Beso

Photography by Achmat Booley

For regular updates on this challenge you can follow my Insta Stories!

Struggling to Write in the Age of Social Media

It’s been a hard year. I say this knowing that it is only June and the idea of a winter slump is only but looming as the days become grey and cast a shadow on our mood here in Cape Town.

But forging a journal entry and bore you all to hair gripping frustration of what the year has been like so far (A career change blog post will probably be coming soon) is not what I came to say.

I’ll get to the mere sorrow of it now, no I mean the gist of it, let’s be positive people! I say this jokingly and regrettably as I , The blogger, The Writer, feel as though I’ve lost my voice. And I’m guessing that has a great deal to do with losing self confidence.

INSERT INSPIRATIONAL QUOTE HERE/I HAVE NONE

I’d much prefer my blog’s content to be uplifting, inspiring and with an odd sense of humour here and there, I guess I enjoy putting people in a good mood. But when you’re not in a good place yourself, it thus becomes harder to write posts that are able to convey a more spirited feeling in a reader.

These past few months have been a creative stalemate and a less inspiring story of what I dream my days would be like. But I’ll keep my overactive imagination to myself for now (or you know, just forever). Ah but what is the point of all this rambling that I seem to always do but say I cannot write when in actual fact I can write far too much for what a reader has the time for in our so called millennial age of immediate and urgent information that hits our eyes in a flash and then disappears faster than when it arrived.

Yes I digress. I guess my point is this, when you feel like you’ve slowed down tremendously in terms of work, everyday tasks, life accomplishments, adulting things etcetera, am I wrong to say that I feel like I’ve lost value in a way? Like my content is no longer relevant if it’s not at a fast paced career driven lifestyle that we love to invest in on The Gram? Oh can we speak about how blogs are now just Instagram feeds? Is there a place for a writer in an instantaneous world? Ahh so many questions!

The Expectations of Social Media

THIS IS NO INSTA-RANT

I actually love the social media platform for multiple reasons and as a photography enthusiast and just your average individual engulfed in this overexposed visual facade we’ve created, photography and modelling is where it started. And I’m happiest creating Instagram content simply because the shoots feel less pressured and altogether a fun and enjoyable experience of picture snaps and outfit changes, which I am all about. But let’s get real, a lot of us have started blogs because we had something to say, rather than something to show. And finding that voice in a virtual reality of saturated imagery is quite difficult, but maybe it means we have to stand for something by writing that which is of value, and of substance.

And for the longest time I felt that I needed self confidence to exude over my blog and onto my social media platforms, and have thus hindered my own writing spirit by this unrealistic expectation that I’d always have to be confident in order to have my voice be heard.

So here I am trying to find the courage to write from a space that is uncomfortably vulnerable and insecure, feeling quite anxious and wondering if my voice is worth reading or worth a listening to if I am not, and not even pretending to be, a have-it-all slash do-it-all slash taking over the world young woman, does my voice then become a white noise fine tuned out of a clear picture or could it be a   melodic note, a little bit soft and a little sweet, something to which you smile and maybe even weep.

Photography by Achmat Booley

Outfit Details: Jeans – Country Road, Pullover – Uniqlo, Boots – Timberland, Coat – My friend’s closet (which I’m sure you’ll see more of in future posts), Handbag – Mors Design (an online sustainable fashion brand from S.A)

My 3 Go-To Summer Fabrics

Okay so the worst of our summer’s heat should be over and done with it but seeing as our in between seasons are only getting shorter and my autumn dreams are fading away, I thought I’d shed a bit of light on my summer closet for God knows it’s been a sweaty one.

So starting off with the obvious choice – Cotton, which surprisingly is not my favourite fabric as it can get a bit thick and heavy for the heat. It by no means prevents a sweaty situation from showing (but in honesty, that is hard to do) and the classic white shirt look becomes uncomfortable after 30 degrees in South Africa. Its saving grace for me and my continuous repurchase of cotton goods lies in its sustainability, and good quality cotton is an easy option when you are running away from poly blends that overtake the budget fashion rails.

Reading labels are essential in this age of fast fashion and buying a poly blend without reading the label first is just all the more annoying. And on that note, you might want to stay far away from polyester in summer as it’s most likely to trap all the heat and leave you a sweaty mess before you’ve even left the house! But there are a few alternatives that are reasonably priced, perhaps not as cheap as polyester but still affordable nonetheless. And cotton is most certainly one of them.

My next go-to fabric and one I’ve definitely learned to love over many years is linen. With a selection of softer linen goods on the market, I’ve developed a great appreciation for linen t-shirts. I find they look far more sophisticated than cotton tees and in my late 20s that’s basically all I want to be.

Over the summer I also fell in love with this linen wrap skirt which has just amped up my fashion dreams and make me feel so bougie in anything that I pair it with, whether that be a cotton tee or a shirt, I’m all for linens all year round. But again, going with organic materials just make sense I guess. The amount of ironing needed to pull them off is so worth it in the end. I remember a time when I bought clothes that didn’t need ironing and now just cannot wear them in the heat without suffocating. It’s all in the fabric so be mindful of what you’re consuming. If you travel a lot and also tend to do this because you can’t be bothered to iron anything, just use your hair straighteners to iron your clothes. It works just as well for your clothes as it does for your hair!

My last go-to fabric for me and probably my favourite one, took me a lot by surprise this year. This vintage mustard shirt is probably my favourite shirt I’ve ever owned and that’s down to its feel and comfort, especially in Cape Town summers.

I legit thought this was a cotton blend because it was all I wanted to wear this summer and I was on the road to only purchasing organic fabrics when I checked the label months after I had purchased it and I found myself surprised to know it’s 100% rayon. Shock Horror to my own bougie-ness I couldn’t believe my go-to favourite summer fabric was actually synthetic.

This actually changed the game for me because I wanted this blog post to be all about organic fabrics but alas I duped myself by falling in love with rayon. Don’t hate me but this is the most breathable shirt that it saved me this summer. And because it’s so loose fitting especially around the arm pits you get a lot of grace and you literally feel cool for the summer.

Skirt – MeMeMe Cape Town, Shirt – Small Change (Kyoto), Slip – Indibrand (Korea), Sandals – Woolworths, Bag & Sunnies were purchased at local Korean stores in Seoul.

Can we take Feminism seriously for a moment?

Can we take feminism seriously for a moment because I’m tired. I’m tired of constantly having the same conversations to women of how men overstep personal boundaries. This fuels me with so much rage that I cannot even write a post and be calm anymore. Get out of my space! And in case you don’t know what someone’s personal space is, let me show you.

This is my Body

Exhibit A 

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  This is my body standing up

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  This is my body sitting down

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  This is my body looking happy

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  This is my body looking sad

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  This is my body taking a walk

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  And this is my body taking a spin

At no point, and at no place are you EVER allowed to touch my body. Don’t touch my body with you hands, don’t touch it with your arms by nudging me, don’t touch my body with your own by brushing up against me. Do not touch my hands, arms, wrists, back, legs, hair, shoulders, don’t even touch my feet! Because it is not your body. And it does not belong to you. It was not created for you. And you have no possession over it. Oh and just so that we are double clear that you know each body part, let’s just make sure you’re not a robot. Circle the labelled body parts in these photos to prove you’re an actual human being. 

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  hands

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  arms

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  wrist

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  forearm

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  hand & wrist

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  back

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  shoulders

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  legs

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  feet

You might think the antics unnecessary but the number of men who don’t care for your personal space and the right you have over your own body is heading for none. I’m tired of guys who come up to me saying ‘hey girl’ and then nudging me with their elbow against my arm. Err excuse me but what stupid game is this? Arm Arm? Elbow Elbow? How about you greet me like a normal human being. Good Morning will do. Oh but don’t roll your eyes or give them a blank stare of death or God forbid tell them how you don’t actually want to talk to them because, they’re not even listening to you. But they sure are looking at you. Because guaranteed the next think that comes out of his mouth is, you should smile more.

And I can write a superfluous amount of paragraphs on these particular encounters, and I can even try and be funny about it, but the truth is that  it’s so demeaning that I can’t understand why I am the one who feels embarrassed at your actions. Why am I the one who feels embarrassed that you need to assert your masculinity? Why do I feel embarrassed that you grabbed me at the wrist? Why do I feel embarrassed that you forced me down to sit? Why am I the one who feels embarrassed that people are staring? And why am I so embarrassed that I sit and smile as not to make a scene? Why am I the one who feels this way? Why do I feel ashamed when you shove your whole body against me? Why me? Why is this my shame?

So can we take feminism seriously for a moment? Because I’m tired.

Posts on a similar note: I don’t have the audacity to be polite / Not every day is a good day

Struggling on the Road to Financial Independence

When I was much younger, I imagined independence would be one straight road, that went something like this > get a degree > get a job > get a good salary > get an apartment > voila! 

So I did all of these things and felt pretty good about it. I’ve written briefly about my experience moving abroad, and it was all I dreamed of doing as a teen. Living on my own in a big city was the life I wanted. And what feels like a hot minute, actually culminated in years spent working abroad, living on my own and travelling parts of the globe. But all things come to an end at some point, so did my time abroad, and that’s when I returned to South Africa and decided to start working consistently on this blog.

 

I was first introduced to the term boomerang kids by a former colleague of mine. And if you weren’t familiar with this term either, Hi I’m Gameema and I’m not sure if that phrase is an actual thing either, but it defines a group of young individuals who after living independently away from their families whether in a different city or somewhere abroad, end up after a period of time moving back in with their parents. So basically, you left the nest, screamed and shouted, and then went back to the nest. Though it sounds like a laugh, I’d like to believe that after all the screaming and trauma of culture shock we actually assimilated into a new environment. And while you take a lot of flak for being back home, there are a few reasons why you shouldn’t bang your head against a wall just yet, or at all.

Living on your own is hard, especially when you’re living abroad. It’s no easy task to undertake, and just by taking steps in the direction  of independence is something to be proud of. The fact that you’re now staying back in your childhood home doesn’t mean your entire experience of being financially independent is null and void. It takes nothing away from the lessons you’ve learned and the amount of growth and courage you’ve gained over that period in your life.

The road to Financial Independence is not a straight one as I had imagined growing up. It winds every so often and life throws some large curves in there. If you’ve taken a detour from your Independence or feel completely stuck on your way then please remember that everyone struggles a long the way. You are definitely not alone. But, speaking of which…

Living alone can be a very exhilarating experience and I wish all of you the chance to experience that time to get to know yourself. But it’s not exactly a poster for having financial independence. So many people, married or single, are also in their parents’ home taking care of things. Couples living together are also having the same money troubles as you as a single person, maybe even more so. We never truly know someone’s financial capacity by whom they’re living with. But why are we even looking at others?

Call is Facebook, Instagram, Whatever, it has become normalised for us to not only show parts of our private life but also to look and almost stalk the lives of others so freely that it dangerously puts us in a mindset where we inadvertently compare our realities to a virtual world. The inspiration for this post came from a video where the speaker said, “It takes time to be financially independent”. And feeling the rush to achieve this goal, yet again, I finally paused.

Standing on your own two feet is incredibly hard. Give yourself a break. Seriously. We feel so much pressure to have everything altogether all the time. Kids are growing up faster, getting rich quicker, adulting faster than we’ve ever imagined, and in our instantaneous world we forget that things take time to manifest. So whilst you don’t have enough money to claim financial independence you do have something else, the power of your own mind. You have the power to create changes in your life that could lead you to financial independence. Make a plan, brainstorm thoroughly, exhaust your resources and execute each and every step of the way. You already have the most powerful tool you could use. One of my favourite quotes from Dr Seuss is that ‘There’s no-one as brainy and footy as you”, and though it is incredibly cute it is also, incredibly true. 

Thank you so much for reading! ❤

Follow me on Instagram | Photos by Jeff Simone

Skincare for your Late 20s

Our late 20s almost feels like a skincare sweet spot as we’re past the awkward breakout stages (touch wood) and not worrying about those wrinkles to form just yet, or those dark spots from spending endless afternoons on the beach in summer. It could very well be the calm before the storm. So easy maintenance in this period of our life could do a lot to prevent future stresses.

My simple skincare routine for this point in time is all about hydration and anti-ageing. But don’t worry, we’re not talking acids or retinols. We are so far away from those ingredients; all we need is a few simple things. Here are my 3 tips to maintain healthy, youthful looking skin when you’re leaving your 20s behind.

#1 Keep Your Skin Hydrated, Always!

This starts with drinking loads of water. It’s that annoying habit we can never keep consistent but it is the most important. And once you see the positive effects on your body, it’s easier to maintain this healthy habit. But when it comes to my skincare routine, there are 2 products I’ve been using both day & night to keep my skin hydrated and moisturised. The COSRX snail mucin serum and the KIEHL’S ultra facial cream. I’ve been using this duo for 5 months now and it’s all my skin needs, even when travelling, I need no more than this. Oh, I said that already. Okay, moving on.

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#2 Wear an SPF, Every Single Day!

Another positive habit to take on if you don’t already! Consistency with skincare really makes the difference. Having good skin is not due to quick fixes, pimple creams and a mask now and then. Good skin comes from consistently taking care of it until you are no longer able. Then I hope you have a friend/family member/life partner/superhero cat to do your skincare routine for you. The habit of putting on sunscreen every morning is probably down to my years living in South Korea but, now that I am 3 months out of Seoul, I am still wearing my SFP 50 PA+++ religiously. You don’t need to use such a high factor for an everyday basis, it’s just the factor on my favourite sunscreen, MISSHA’s Essence Sun Milk. But you do you boo!

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#3 Please DO Wear an Eye Cream

Yes, I’m an advocate for wearing an eye-cream every day. I do feel the extra expense of yet another skincare product is worth it at this age. But that’s because I’ve seen how well it works in reducing fine lines. It seems that the most common problems with buying into eye-creams is that a.) They can’t get rid of your dark circles and b.) They can’t get rid of your wrinkles either.

4 Reasons Why You Should Use an Eye Cream

• hydrate the under eye area which to prevent future fine lines
• brighten the under eye area to slowly reduce the appearance of dark circles over time (wow I sound like an ad)
• get rid of fine lines caused by stress and dehydration
• make you see the difference between fine lines and wrinkles and once it lifts those fine lines, you’ll see at this age that you don’t even have wrinkles and there’s no need to panic about it

My eye-cream of choice and the one I’ve seen the best results from is, the KIEHL’S creamy eye treatment with avocado. I wear it every morning before I put on my concealer and it has really made a difference to my under eye area. Just like any other product, it becomes trial & error. I used the KIEHL’S Midnight Recovery eye-cream and to no luck, I actually felt as though it made my under eye area dry by the morning. So just because one doesn’t work for you, doesn’t mean you shouldn’t invest in them at all. It does feel like the most noticeable area to show ageing so find one that works for you. Consistency in these 3 simple steps has really proven to be the key to looking younger (or just not looking as tired).

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Hope you found this post helpful ❤ 

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Money & Travel – Seeing the Big Picture

I was 20 when I  made the decision to live abroad. I can even remember the moment itself, the clear night, stars out, moon’s bright, the open window where I sat dreaming of a bigger life. It’s almost cliche. But the desire to see more of this world and the realisation that it was more than the “what if”s and “I want”s. Something changed that night, in me, in my thought process, in my own language, to a more positive “I can” and “I will”. Thus became the moment I decided to do a TEFL course and teach English in South Korea.

It took a year from making that decision to actually moving abroad. It was the year of 2011, the year I learned to actively chase a dream, to work multiple jobs and to make monetary sacrifices. 2011 was a hard year for me, but the only thing that got me through was this unusually powerful feeling of wanting to do something great, and a large part of that was getting out of my environment. It went beyond independence, beyond the exploration of a new place, beyond travelling alone. It was about being that person who took a risk, who was strong enough to leave, it was about being a young girl and chasing her dreams, it was about breaking boundaries to me.

I lived a pretty small life I’d say, grew up in a small community where I played in the streets with my cousins and neighbours’ kids. We all went to the same schools more or less but separated when we went to different universities. I guess that’s where I made new friends. We somehow all ended up working at the same bookstore and laughed so hard our stomachs hurt. We read a lot of books, danced to a lot of music I no longer listen to today, and still pick up where we left off every now and then when we run into each other on a whim.  But the one song that stood out to me at the time was Coldplay’s Paradise. Not because it meant anything to our group, but because it hit home to me, there was something about this song that inspired me to move, to travel, to find the things I was looking for, and to venture into a world with how much ever little money I have and just believe I would find what I was looking for at the end of it all.

And as if the universe was speaking to me, Coldplay announced their tour dates to South Africa. And it would have been the sweetest moment for the girl who danced so whimsically in a tiny room as if the walls could expand for her. And a lot of times, it felt like they did. But the moment was short lived as the cost of physically moving abroad became evident.

I estimated that I needed about R23000 ZAR (South African Rand) in total. This included:
a flight ticket, winter clothing, because Cape Town’s winters were a blessing in comparison to the northern hemisphere, a laptop (only because I didn’t have one), a backpack as part of my luggage, admin fees with regard to the application, such as messengers, DHL  and all the small things, oh and did I mention enough money to live for 40 days in Korea before your first paycheck? Yeah that too. At that time I remember the Rand being about R6 to the US dollar. And I was still working my university part-time job and earning about R2000 a month at R20 an hour. I knew there would not be a scrap of paper left to afford a ticket to see one of my favourite bands ever.

At 21, to give up a concert ticket to put money towards a bigger dream, was extremely and utterly heart breaking. Until this day, I can’t forget the feeling of wanting something so badly, something you wished for so many years to happen, and being surrounded by the excitement of all your friends, and fake a feeling of excitement for them to go and enjoy a show you wished so badly you could attend. That was the time I was forced to pick my future. 
 It was the time I was forced to choose the life I wanted. I wanted to go to a concert, when it’s not at the expense of something greater. The money of that ticket was the first time I actively started saving up for my move to Korea. And it was a heart sore moment that I decided would not be in vain. And so, saving became easier after that moment, because there was nothing harder than the first step.

 And I could write a whole other story about how I worked in that year to get that figure and get out,  how I hustled, studied and worked multiple jobs, but the lesson lies in the this particular story. It’s in your mindset and how you approach life. You have to see the bigger picture. And it’s okay if the lessons along the way break your heart. In the end, they become a part of you. It’s funny how a concert ticket felt like the biggest sacrifice I ever made – It wasn’t. It wasn’t long after leaving did I feel what heartbreak actually felt like. We find strength in Life’s fragile moments, no matter how big, no matter how small. 

You have to know where you’re going, to get to where you  are. 

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Photography by Jeff Simone

Why your 20s are for staying out late and sleeping in your makeup

Nadine Baggott once mentioned that she slept in her makeup all throughout her 20s and early 30s. Surprised by the skincare advocate and woman looking amazing for not removing makeup for a decade, it was only in the past month or so that I actually agree with her statement. Strange? From someone who vowed never to sleep in their makeup, never to remove it with cleansing wipes and double cleanse at night, I’m finally thinking Screw it, I’ll fix it in the morning. And I do, with a good cleanse and a hardcore eye cream, no one will even notice, not even you. Because when you feel good, you look good.

But there’s something so funny about this idea that it actually sounds true, that there’s a time in your life when you shouldn’t be worrying about these things, where you shouldn’t be so careful about everything, when you should be running around with your friends in immense laughter having late nights in the the city, when you should be travelling and exploring the world, taking risks and trying different things, and for most of us, that time is our 20s. So the Korean skincare routine feels too proper, too time consuming and too formal for the 20 something woman just doing her thing where ever she may be in the world. The negligence is carefree, it’s playful and rebellious. And I love every part of of the drop into a soft mattress and the comfort of the covers snuggling me as my head hits the pillow, mascara staining the pillow case, and having no worries about it. There’s just the blissful feeling of having a memorable time and all the excitement that awaits for the next day. It’s about living in the moments, not sweating the small stuff and leaving the ‘adult’ things for later.

What I’m wearing – Frea Sweatshirt

Photos by Nil Erturk

Makeup by Yagiz Yoldas

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Want something similar? See A Minimal Approach to Skincare

 

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70s Inspired Outfit – Styling Flare Jeans

The push to purchase only 100% cotton denim started months back when I felt fed up of the annual repurchase of expensive jeans and the waste of cash spent on denim that do not last you a long time. But with the South African market still being a couple seasons behind the international trend, stretch denim was still the Be All and End All of the denim industry inside my home country, making 100% cotton jeans hard to find. Though there are more options in stores now as we speak.

On a recent trip to Turkey, I was in the playing fields of good quality denim, affordable prices and incredible service. Basically, I was in my happy place. That’s where I found these flare jeans! Coming in at 99% cotton, I couldn’t not buy them as the fit and more importantly, the cut, was hard to come by. It was somehow longer than my long legs and gave me a reason to wear heels every day. But I don’t see this cut anymore, not even in vintage stores. It was a must-buy scenario, you know, things I tell myself.

Feeling proper 70s with my heel boots and my loose button down shirt, these jeans sure do give me a confidence boost. And with that 1% elastane, it’s a lot more forgiving than my standard 100% cotton jeans. So I can still grab a burger (and fries) and hide it all in the high waisted fit because I know they will hug my food baby right into place. Usually I avoid elastane at all costs, but for a pair of flares in late 2018, no way was I going to pass up this offer!

There’s something about these jeans that feel effortless. I’m almost certain they are past the their comeback days but trends, I do not follow. A good cut and exceptional quality will always look good and stand the test of time. And with its classic wash of blue denim, I can’t see them ever being out of style.

Jeans – Stradivarius, Shirt – Country Road, Hat – Oxxo, Boots – Timberland

Photography by Lindsey Fourie/ Follow me on Instagram here!

I don’t have the audacity to be polite

I don’t have the audacity to be polite, to sit and smile at the gestures I dislike – when you infringe on my space without my consent, nudging me with your elbow, grabbing my hand, my wrist if you will, all to pay a fucking bill.

I don’t have the audacity to be patient, to entertain you in small talk, chit chats of how you’re this and how you’re that – to gaze at your continuing smirks, beholding your own ego.

I don’t have the audacity to be kind, to give you an explanation for not joining you on your lavish plans, to constantly think of reasons to say why I don’t want to have a drink.  I’m not interested in trying your mulled wine, or going on a sunset drive. I just don’t want to – why is that not enough.

I don’t have the audacity to say yes – to lengthen my no-s, to drag them out pretending I am uncertain about this. I don’t have the audacity to say yes, just to be polite, in order to spare your feelings and to fucking smile when I say ‘no’.

I have no time for you. I have no time for the arrogance of men.

Photography by Lindsey Fourie.

Don’t Close your Eyes Darling

It’s not often that I find myself fighting to hang on to a passing moment. To travel – that was always the dream, not just to wander but to search in and through a land so that I could find something. Isn’t it typical? Man’s quest for meaning. But what I found is this longing, that something could last just a little longer, not necessarily to go back to it or to have it again, but when you’re travelling, right there is a moment you’d thought could never happen or has happened too soon and there’s something in you that wishes it could go on, for another minute, another second, if the sunrise could prolong itself, if the drive over the Bosphorous were slower, if I could stay awake just a bit more, fighting sleep in order to see what has become from a dream.

Don’t close your eyes darling. Keep them wide open, there on the open road with the sunset falling behind you, the dark clouds hovering the night sky. Don’t fall to sleep in this moment. Soon you’ll be on a flight, miles away from this moment. Don’t close your eyes darling. Lying in between white sheets with the full moon seducing you at the window. Stay there, in the dim light, in the presence that you arrived, smiling at the thought of possibility, and how everything fell into place. You are always in the right place. Even when it’s a dark place, lost at dawn searching for a place to view the sunrise. But then it happens – the balloons take flight and mesmerise the pink sky. All too soon, you hope it could stay too long. Keep your eyes wide open at the sky, at the moon, at the break of dawn, at sunrise, on the road. Keep them open darling, for the moment shall pass, but its memory is all you’ll have and it will last.

All photos are my own. Find me on Instagram for more of my photography journey ♥